HOT ROLLS: Ozark, MO!

Something I have been meaning to share, but haven’t quite found the time was the rest of our cross-country road trip out here to California. We began in Indiana and trekked over 3,000 miles to our new home. It took us a little over a week and in that week memories were created that neither of us will ever forget.

We packed up the giant Uhaul that our parents graciously drove cross-country for us and took off toward a new adventure, new unknowns, and a new life. When planning our trip out West I had one stipulation. DJ found this request comical, considering we basically could stop anywhere along the way. BUT- once you go, once you try this place, you will understand!

What is this life-changing place? I’m glad you asked. LAMBERT’S CAFE. Last year we went here on our way to a wedding in Tulsa. It is located right off the highway in Ozark, MO. I could not wait to go back and what better time than this road trip? Let me tell ya, it did not take much to convince the hubs!

If I could require everyone to go to one restaurant in their lives, it would be to here. This is your deep, southern fried, nothing-beats-it, grandma’s cooking. To people from the East, I would describe it as “Cracker Barrel on steroids”. Anytime you go, be prepared to wait at least an hour. This place is as good as they claim, and everyone from across the country knows it. They have a map outside their restaurant and they have pins to mark where you are from. There are people from every state across the US. I am telling you- people travel from Alaska for this! THAT GOOD.

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Anywho- what makes this place so special you ask? Here is a pretty typical trip to Lambert’s:

  1. The car ride over looks something like this. gif excited.gif
  2. Once you arrive, you battle all the other cars for a parking spot. 200 (3).gif
  3.  Then, you walk to the outdoor window hostess to put your name in, walking quicker than the six-person family a few steps ahead of you, because, hey, gotta beat them for that table.

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3. You wait for an hour, but it feels more like days. You find yourself salivating as you dream of “HOT ROLLS!”

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4. You check the time incessantly. Maybe you go to the gift store, maybe check out the map of the US to see where the other roll-addicts are from, but really, you just get to do some hardcore people watching.

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5. They call your name over the loud speaker outside. You are in a state of disbelief, that yes, it’s you. You tell yourself to move; you pinch yourself, afraid you are dreaming. When you see your friends’ faces light up with a goofy distorted excitement you know it’s real. It’s time.

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6. You make your way to your table and soak in the views of the heavenly food on everyone’s plates. Decisions. Horribly difficult, amazing decisions.

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7. Once seated, the waiter explains how “it works”. But you already know how it works, oh, you know! They bring you out the most gargantuan soda of your whole life. The waiters with the charmingly, nerdy uniforms ask you if you would like some fried okra. You wonder why they even ask; you wonder if it would be weird to hug them.

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7. You down that delicious okra. Oh wait… what is that smell? Could it be…? “HOT ROLLS!” You wave your hand, you jump up and down, you do whatever you can so that they just might throw one of carby buns in your direction.

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8. FINALLY. That hot, doughy piece of bread touches your fingertips. The waiter with the sorghum (aka your new best friend) loads it on that fluffy piece of heaven. You finally understand, it is all so clear, your sole purpose in life is to eat these rolls.

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9. The waiter brings out your food, and now you can try the rest of the pass-arounds: The macaroni and tomatoes, the fried potatoes and onions, the black eyed peas. You sample your sides. WHY IS COLD CHUNKY APPLESAUCE SO GOOD?! Your emotions overtake you.

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10. You finish your meal and walk away from the table. You just remind yourself, “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” 

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Wishing you many throwed rolls,

xo <3

Mack