20 Things that Happen When you Become a Long-Distance Runner

1. Your tan lines are def not cute, but for some reason that tank stripe down your back, the especially awkward white thighs, and permanent socks create some feelings of pride because #commitment.

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2. Weekend long runs= weekday carb load. ‘Nough said.

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3. While we are on that food topic…. on your long run you think about the endless amounts of food you will then proceed to devour the rest of the day.

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4. Sometimes you get lost in deep, philosophical thoughts for miles. Seriously- all the epiphanies come on long runs, but you forget them all the minute someone mentions pizza.

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5. Oh, and there’s that first time when you realize there is nowhere to pee and you’re ten miles out.

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6. Butttt not too long into the game you also realize peeing in the woods is totally acceptable.. (deep, deep into the woods)

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7. Ohhh and then there’s that moment when you are more fit than ever in your life, but your jeans like to feel more snug #musclemadness

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8. Post run coffee appreciation is a thing. A real thing. A real big thing.

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9. Annnnd that glorious moment you get your first runner’s high, and you begin to rethink your whole life because you are suddenly convinced you could do absolutely anything you set your mind to: Starting an orphanage in Timbuktu while writing a NY Times Best Seller and getting your pHD in Quantum physics suddenly sounds feasible.

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10. Until you hit the wall.

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11. But then you have your beloved fanny pack/pockets/sports bra (Come on, ya know you do it too) filled with gu, jelly beans, waffle zingers, and twizzlers to get you through those last few miles. Don’t mess with a runner’s sugar supplies.

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12. There’s also that moment you realize that you can actually call yourself, “A runner”.

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13. You additionally start scheduling your whole weekend around your long run.

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14. Oh shoot, and then there are those times people ask how many miles you run each day, and you panic, because A. There is no set number per day and B. You are nervous you will eventually have to explain that F word: Fartlek.

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15. After 100 cobwebs, 20 mosquitoes, and calves full of mud, you finish up that trek feeling like the nature warrior you are.

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16. When folding your laundry, your running clothes greatly out number the “normal person” clothes because you also wear your running clothes even on days off. Did I really wear all sixty-two of these sports bras in one week?!

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17. Wait…did I mention the food after?

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18. And we all know when you see a someone else with the same pair of running shoes you use, or even the same brand, you automatically know they are probably a really decent human being, and you want to be their friend.

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19. One word. TAPER.

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20. Last, but certainly not least, let us not forget- post run naps= ultimate naps. Can I get an AMEN?!

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xo <3

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